No, We Haven’t Been To Mars

July 1, 2010

Sorry, folks, but I’m going to have to call bullshit on this one, with an extra helping of not fucking likely.

Here’s the video:

The bloggers here would have you think this is a lost film shot during a joint U.S./Soviet expedition to Mars in the 1970s. I say that’s a crock. Here’s why:

  1. It looks fake. It looks like someone jiggling a modern digital camcorder over a picture of Mars, with an old camera lens and a model rocket held in front with masking tape.
  2. If anyone landed on Mars, we would know. Why keep it a secret?
  3. Oh, because of the aliens. Sure. It always comes back to the aliens.
  4. If we’ve already been to Mars, why are we now sending robot landers? What’s the point? It’s not as though people on Earth were clamouring for NASA to get to Mars. Most people don’t give a shit these days.
  5. The idea of the U.S. and the Soviet Union teaming up for anything in the 1970s is ludicrous. I’d be more likely to believe Fidel Castro stopped by for coffee with Jimmy Carter.

We haven’t been to Mars, folks. And we may never go to Mars. We have been to the moon, and we stopped going, because it’s actually kind of pointless to go to the moon more than once or twice. Well, that’s what I used to think; now we know it holds a lot of water, so there’s that.

I’d be more interested in visiting Venus, if only for the chance to work on my tan.


One comment

  1. Yes, I call bull***t on this as well. It actually looks pretty good for homemade, basement special effects, but there are two easy giveaways. First, the annoying zooming in and out. Cameras in the 70’s didn’t have zoom lenses that responsive. Definitely a modern camcorder. Second, the photo at the end is clearly Victoria Crater, where one of the rovers was recently. The picture is from the orbiting camera platform of which I forget the name, but it’s been in orbit of Mars for some time now. A bonus giveaway is the “ship.” It’s clearly the ISS, not some 70’s Mars capsule. The only honest part here is that the ISS was partially built in Russia, so I suppose technically the ISS is a joint US/Russian mission.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: