10 Things I Hate About Making Lists of 10 Things

February 22, 2010

10. The first item I think of is usually the only one that’s actually funny.

9. I then spend too much time trying to figure out where to place that item on the list.

8. This eats into how much time I put into thinking up more funny, clever items.

7. I usually forget No. 7 entirely, and have to go back and insert it. I’m not sure what I have against 7.

6. It’s easy to be tempted to make it a Top 8 list, or Five Facts, or something, but society demands Top 10, so I’m kind of stuck.

5. Here’s where I save this as a draft, only to be reminded of it every time I log in, until finally, after about a week, I finish the job.

4. I don’t put much effort into things.

3. You probably noticed that around the time I started putting up YouTube videos with one-sentence reviews under them.

2. Did you ever notice how the funniest item on David Letterman’s Top 10 list tends to be No. 2?

1. That’s because he likes to end it quickly with a short, sharp shock for No. 1, and so do I, fuckers.


One comment

  1. Technically, #3 isn’t a thing. It’s a continuation of #4. You owe us a thing.

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