Michael Jackson: Bigger Than Jesus

July 6, 2009

There’s no denying the late King of Pop had a massive worldwide following. His people stayed with him for years, long after his last hit, long after his controversial trial and acquittal on child molestation charges, long after his first rhinoplastic step into the recesses of extreme body modification. His fans loved him. They still love him. He was the biggest-selling music star in the world last week, and likely to remain so for some time.

But in Stockton, California, he’s bigger than Jesus.

Some people say so. This emerged after a Stockton man, Felix Garcia, reported that an image of Michael Jackson had appeared in the whorls of a tree in his yard. This is no frivolity, like that grilled-cheese sandwich you might have heard about a few years ago. This really is Michael Jackson’s likeness. You’d agree if you could only see past the blurry, indistinct woodiness of the image. And also the delusion.

Once Garcia went public with his discovery — which has apparently been there for 25 years, but wasn’t noticed until Jackson made it back into print — other Stocktonians came forward to discuss Jackson and what he meant to the community. There’s a reason for this: Jackson, whose humanitarian work often goes forgotten, visited Stockton 20 years ago to offer solace after a school shooting. So there’s reason for people to remember him fondly. Here’s a sampling:

“… Michael Jackson was an icon to us,” one of Garcia’s neighbours told reporters.

“To Stockton, Michael Jackson meant more to us than Jesus, to some people. I think they’re both about even.”

Other folks say the image in the tree is Jesus. CBS is reporting, too, that some people see The Scarecrow, but whether they mean the Wizard of Oz character or a more generic scarecrow isn’t made clear.

I have studied the images very closely. I used all the high-tech Weather Station photo-analysis software I have here. After careful consideration, I can tell you, with all certainty: It’s a tree.

As much as I want to believe in paranormal phenomena, strange happenings, arcane science and ancient mysteries, I like to think I need a little more, what’s it called, uh, yeah: proof.

Garcia, meanwhile, says he hopes nobody comes and cuts down his tree. I don’t think he has anything to worry about.


One comment

  1. I’m afraid this melon trumps the tree.

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