As some of you may know, my world-roaming friend Patrick, also known as Chris P. Bacon, is touring the United States. For the past two months, he’s been on a couchsurfing contintental cross-cross, seeing the sights, meeting the people, getting into adventures … He just visited Metropolis, Illinois, and sent me this hilarious postcard to go with the one he sent me from Riverside, Iowa (hometown of Captain Kirk) a couple of weeks ago.
Patrick documents his travels wonderfully, and there seems to be a new album on Facebook every day. His Journey Across America series is up to album 26 or so now, and they’ve been a real treat. But I noticed a trend after a few days: the places he’s visiting are connected by a thread of nerdery. Patrick is on the ultimate hobo fanboy adventure, and we get to share.
Here are my picks for Patrick’s Top 10 (So Far) Stops on One Nerd’s Journey
- Graceland. You can probably imagine my envious drool when I saw those photos. I’m a super-charged lifelong Elvis fan, but I’ve still never been to Graceland.
- Milwaukee. Patrick dressed like the Fonz to stand beside a life-size statue of the Fonz.
- Whitewater rafting in Northern California, With Actual Girls: You know, like that movie The River Wild. With Meryl Streep.
- Nashville: After visiting the Grand Ole Opry, Patrick sat in the General Lee. Let that sink in for a moment.
- Metropolis, Illinois: Patrick is the world’s biggest Superman fan, so this was a must-see for him. We had plans to go together a few years ago, but I went and kept having kids and stuff. While there, he met the mayor, who stamped his passport with the city seal.
- South Dakota: He saw Mount Rushmore. I’m going to Photoshop his face onto it, along with mine, David Hasselhoff’s and The Burger King’s.
- Riverside, Iowa: Where Captain Kirk was born in the old continuity, and where he listened to the Beastie Boys in the new.
- Winslow, Arizona: He stood on the corner. Yes, that corner.
- Victoria, British Columbia: A quick detour into Canada found Patrick reuniting with our old pal Hank, the finest rockabilly musician north of Nashville.
- Griffith Park, Los Angeles. Patrick went to the Bronson Cave, which was used as the Batcave in the old Adam West series, and has appeared in tons of other movies and TV shows. Including Star Trek. Sadly, it did not have a giant coin and a stuffed dinosaur inside it. Just empty beer cans, used condoms and a homeless man in a Robin costume.
This is just the tip of Patrick’s iceberg, with more adventures to come: He’s off to Washington now. Apparently the Obamas are letting him crash on an old plaid sofa in the White House bowling alley.
I’ll leave you with this treat, filmed at Bronson Cave in 1953 … an epic of science fiction suckness.