It was Earth Day today. So here’s what I did for the environment:
- I put the laundry on the clothesline, rather than in the dryer. Then it hailed.
- I collected the empty beer bottles people tend to throw out of their vehicles on my street. I can usually make about $1.60 a week picking them up.
- I looked for ways to get rid of the dead skunk. No success.
- I used no paper. None at all. My normal habit of printing notes was set aside, and I kept a text window of notes open on my laptop while I worked on the main computer. I might do that from now on. Usually the laptop just plays Star Trek episodes.
- I turned off the furnace, even though it was only a few degrees above zero. Likewise, I did not use the air conditioner.
- I did not drive. The minivan stayed put.
- I did not spray anything aerosol. Actually, I don’t own anything aerosol.
- Tonight is the night I put out the garbage and recycling, so I went extra-hardcore and sorted through all the wastebaskets looking for anything recyclable. This made me wonder why there were unfamiliar candy wrappers in my kid’s bedroom. Hmmm.
- I was going to pose for a photo in a Speedo, but it needed laundering, and I didn’t want to waste the water. Another day.
- I didn’t waste water by cleaning or doing the dishes or anything like that. They can wait until tomorrow, when it isn’t Earth Day. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Earth Day, baby.


