Party Time With Drunk Lindsay Lohan
October 22, 2008
Three guys are suing Lindsay Lohan because, they claim, she ‘kidnapped’ them and drove around in an SUV in a scary way. This comes the same day that fellow superstar/hottie/shitty driver Britney Spears beat a criminal charge because the jury deadlocked, the judge declared a mistrial and the prosecution said “forget it, let her go.” It pays to be famous, even when you’re stupid.
Here’s the Associated Press story on the Lohan case:
SANTA MONICA, Calif. — A wild ride that led to Lindsay Lohan’s arrest has sparked another lawsuit.
Court records show that three men who claim they were in a sport utility vehicle that Lohan commandeered in July 2007 sued the “Mean Girls” star last week. Their allegations include battery, false imprisonment and that the actress was negligent when she allegedly took over one of the men’s SUVs to chase her recently fired assistant.
That chase ended when the assistant’s mother called police because she was being followed and led Lohan toward a police station.
Officers suspected Lohan was drunk and arrested her. Lohan’s lawyer calls the lawsuit, first reported by TMZ, “absurd.” The men are seeking more than $25,000.
Okay, I’m firing up the Weather Station 1 time-machine/mind-reader to go back and look into the thoughts of these three champs. Yes, here we are. Do you want to see the five stages of their stupidity? Here we go, with a peek into the one-track mind of Los Angeles Party Time Dude No. 1:
- “Dudes, that totally looks like Lindsay Lohan staggering around over there. Let’s check it out.”
- “Dudes, it totally IS Lindsay Lohan, and she wants us to go with her for a ride in that bitchin’ SUV!”
- “Dudes, one of us might totally get lucky with a movie star, yo. Maybe two of us. Maybe all of us! She may not be wearing panties, too, yo.”
- “Dudes, this chick is a bad driver. I think I read that in the tabloids once, too. Man, I wish I wasn’t so stupid so’s I could remember things like … uh, what was I talking about?”
- “Dudes, she’s not wearing panties and we’re going to crash! Hey, look, it’s the cops. Dudes, let’s go get us a lawyer!”
I doubt this lawsuit will go very far, but I plan to keep watching, because it’s really stupid, and I like stupid.
